Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Conquering Obstacles (Part 44--Moving On)

There were times in my life when I had regretted doing or saying certain things, but nothing compared to the regret I felt after having asked him that "question." It was as if it had turned him into an entirely different person and not for the better, which took me by total surprise. 

 He continued to stop by but the visits seemed to become further and further apart, similar to the late night phones calls before bedtime. I couldn't help but feel that he had lost interest in me, which was more or less a common pattern in my life by now.

My Tuesday nights were always spent playing in the pool league, while his league night was normally on Wednesday. We had never attended each other's competition so when he showed up one night while I was playing on league, I was slightly confused, but happy to see him. However, it would have been nice if he would have at least spoken to me, but he didn't. This continued for several weeks, and on the last night of our league season, he walked through the door with another girl, woman, lady...whatever she was.

I was so hurt and angry that I couldn't stand the sight of him. How could he do this to me in front of all my friends? But when the competition was over and he had left, I told Shirley, my partner, "I'm gone!  I am following him!" So I did...to the Horseshoe Club. As I walked through the door, our eyes met simultaneously as though he had been waiting for me. He immediately came to me, took me by the hand, and led me outside.

What ensued was not what I had expected by any means, and I will not share with my readers the most vicious comment he made to me that night. I cried harder than I had in a very long time.The next evening (Wednesday, his league night) he called to apologize and said that he'd come to visit on Thursday night if I wanted to see him. I agreed because I needed to know what was going on in his mind. Thursday night came and went, but he was a "no show." I was angry at him, but more so at myself for being such a fool. How many times was I going to let this happen to me?

I had initially decided not to return to work in Yellowstone that summer, but early the next morning, I made a call to my former boss asking him if there happened to be an opening for me. (Most employees apply in January or February and it was now the end of May.)

"Can you start work tomorrow morning?" he asked.

"I'll be there bright and early."

My anger drove me that day to quickly pack my household belongings, which I took to my parents house to store for the summer. I certainly didn't need to burden them with my problems, but I asked them to say nothing to anyone regarding my whereabouts. They agreed. I also contacted several of my friends that he knew, and explained to them what had happened, and asked them NOT to tell him where I was should he ever ask about me.

I returned to gather the rest of my belongings and then head for the park. Locking the door behind me, I quietly said farewell to this chapter of my life for I knew that I would never return.

To be continue...

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